Radar Sherpa:performance chant band
Radar Sherpa make an elephant big-house call
Clay and I cruise slowly into the Santa Barbara zoo's parking lot and after 5 minutes or so the black Beam is resting in the shade. Our entrance into the animal prison is delayed by the mini train which clangs and clacks along just inside the black iron gates which mark the entrance to Noah's prison.
95% of the visitors are families and many stare curiously at the 2 strange men as I pay the 20 dollar entrance fee. We walk slowly along the wide cemented pathway checking out some otters as they swim around in their tiny little cement wading pool filled with clear water. We pass a couple monkey cages and listen to the crows banter songs of freedom up in the tall trees - they are the only wild animals in the zoo. The rest have been domesticated, compartmentalized and bleached into hollow replicas of their ancestors. The elephant jail soon appears. I am happy to see that they are not forced to walk on concrete. Clay and I sit and observe as one grand elephant walks as if in slow motion out from his cement building. He seems to look me straight in the eye and I watch as his giant ears flap around gathering the various noises into his brain and gently shooing away the hungry insects. It almost seems like he is going to walk towards me and receive my didjeridoo blessing up close. He has a big grin on his big gray face and then makes a right hand turn towards a red-faced dehydrated looking animal handler who has hay, pellets and a branch for him to munch on. I take my timber slide-didge out of its case and begin to play. The elephant seems to hear and pauses in his snacking to wave his ears around curiously seemingly in response to some of my higher frequency overtones, tonings and singings.
After playing for 10 minutes or so, two zoo employees walk by quickly and then a minute or so later they return from the other direction and politley say: "Musical instruments are not allowed to be played here because the animals may become dangerous to people. Their response to music is unpredictable and we do not want that here. Even though they seem to be enjoying your music, I have to tell you to stop."
While she spoke, her eyes looked up and to the left, diagonally, leading me to believe that I was witnessing an automated response. After she completed her diplomatic paragraph I said: "Well that concludes my visit then. I guess I won't be getting a membership here. Thanks for being so nice in the way you told me to stop."
With that, Clay and I smoothly began our exit. When we reached the ticket window, I asked for a refund. "I've only been here 20 minutes and would like my money back."
"Why?"
I smile and say: "Well, I came here to bless the elephants and it turns out that it is illegal to bless the elephants, so I think that it is ridiculous for me to pay 20 dollars when I just provided a million dollar blessing for free."
The supervisor smiled knowingly, understanding that I was joking and not joking. He handed me back my $20 and we left the animal prison.





Comments (12)
http://www.torontosun.com/News/2007/07/12/4334175.html
Comment #1 Posted by: mc ellefant | July 14, 2007 05:54 PM
"Musical instruments are not allowed to be played here because the people may become dangerous to themselves and each other. Their response to music is unpredictable and we do not want that here. Even though they seem to be enjoying your music, I have to tell you to stop."
Mike, they let you IN with a didj case? doesnt that look like...i dunno, a bazooka? :)
Comment #2 Posted by: evan | July 16, 2007 08:06 AM
Hey Didj - evan wasn't being negative towards you. He was playing along. I'm sure he's on your side, buddy.
Comment #3 Posted by: Tyler | July 16, 2007 01:56 PM
Oops, sorry about that...
Comment #4 Posted by: mike didj | July 16, 2007 04:12 PM
is there a post missing?
anyway, thanks for reading me right, Tyler. i certainly am playing along...it was risky for me to be sarcastic in the first place.
i have a great photograph from the SB Zoo of a ravenous crowd of camera-wielding humans mauling each other to take photographs of a lion that cannot even be seen in the photo. it's less than a couple of feet on the other side of the glass, and yet seemingly uncaring (read: dead) about the commotion and flashes. what might music do: reawaken them? remind them of their ancient selves? might it soothe the humans, or even provoke them to dance or sway, unpredictably?
sorry your outing didnt go as planned, Didj...although somehow i suspect you might have suspected it'd turn out that way, you provocateur you. :)
Comment #5 Posted by: evan | July 16, 2007 04:43 PM
Yeah Ev, my 'radar' told me not to play until I got near the elephant cage because I suspected that my chanting would be 'disruptive' to the status quo. I removed 2 of my comments because they were stupid, inflammatory and a distraction towards what I am trying to call attention to: the unnecessary suffering of animals - in fact zoos are torture chambers. You actually inferred the allegory correctly with your rewording of some of my post. Animal zoos are everywhere.
As our country continues to swirl around the artificial pool of facisism, I cannot help but wonder when music will be reclassified as something dangerous and then musicians will become synonomous with terrorists. During the Holocoast era, when concentration camps subjected the people of Judah to unprecedented experiments, singing was considered taboo through out Germany.
Comment #6 Posted by: mike didj | July 16, 2007 05:16 PM
Fascist?; You mean like censoring comments on a public forum? You HAVE lost the plot MB. It is your own pain you are projecting onto the animal. Those elephants are far more powerful than you realize. They are there for a reason you do not understand. Humble yourself, along with your "million dollar blessing" and receive THEIR gift.
Comment #7 Posted by: Their gift | July 16, 2007 06:12 PM
1. You deleted my comment, where I criticized you for what you said to evan (which is also erased) and where I noted your self-obsession and that your presence likely not only scared the animals, but children as well.
2. Are you comparing the way you were treated at the zoo(being asked not to play your music) to what happened during the Holocaust (and did you mean to spell it "Holocoast?")?
Comment #8 Posted by: Name Withheld | July 16, 2007 06:58 PM
Sorry Name Withheld, your public chastisement of me is well deserved. Please continue to 'humble' me. I erased the comment towards Evan because I recognized how off base it was and a distraction from my issue with zoos. Once again, sorry if I offended anyone. I look forward to any more insights into how self obsessed I am so that I may learn to get passed it. Thanks for taking the time to help me. I erased the comment you directed towards me because I felt embarrassed.
Comment #9 Posted by: mike didj | July 16, 2007 07:19 PM
I don't think we're playing on an equal playing field here where some folks get to "take back" what they said while others don't. If you want people to continue to post on the Ojai Post, then censorship should not be allowed.
Comment #10 Posted by: Coleen Ashly | July 19, 2007 09:55 AM
Coleen - I agree with you, but I allow authors to moderate their own discussions. I would however offer that the playing field isn't level when commenters can leave inflammatory or derogatory comments hidden behind anonymity. Thanks for the input, I listen! - Tyler
Comment #11 Posted by: Tyler | July 19, 2007 10:53 AM
What songs were you playing?
Comment #12 Posted by: A. Mozart | July 19, 2007 01:03 PM