ojai news at The Ojai Post :: blog, newspaper, events in Ojai, California

truth be said bios are pretty hilarious...

I love it. It is indeed pretty funny to read the bios in the context presented.

Anyway, it seems that his link to his new blog, ETA VTA, does not work. The post that Lisa is referring to appears to be his personal blog, Down with Pants.

Let's hope it appears soon.

Hey, we're famous!

It's working now.

How the hell can you people call this the Ojai Post, none of you are even faintly from Ojai, you are like the rest of the Johnny-cum-lately's, you think you know Ojai and truthfully you don't know Jack-S--T.

Be scared R. Ellis. We are the new Ojai. We are bent on your destruction. Your time is past. We are turning Ojai into a probiotic, Buddhist-possible-Christian, green, do-gooding, peace-worshipping, past-living, enema-digging town of skilled communicators whether you like it or not. We are the new Ojai, world citizens all, working to delete the troglodyte inbred slope-forehead narrow eyed so-called "locals" from our valley, which the true "we" recognize as the ancestral home of all true peoples.

Aren't you from Ventura, anyway? That's where we propose shipping all the inbred old-timers when our silver flying cargo ships arrive with our friends from the sky, so get ready for some company.

Uh-oh... I wasn't supposed to divulge the plan. Please don't delete me... NOOOooooo....

Thanks for being good sports about it, I was just playing around. Taking things out of context is what I do best! And I take it back, you do have a sense of humor.

Hey R.Ellis - why don't you save it for an editorial in the Voice, and send us some traffic like SanMarchi did.

See what I mean, you newby's don't got a clue. Once you start badmouthing old time Ojaites, the inner spirit of the land will come to claim you. So if you have anything left you wanna do now is the time, because you don't have long before the big flush.

So much for the peaceful, spiritual Ojai I thought I had come to know in my 8 years here.

P.S. to anonymous, I am now living in Ojai as are many real Ojaiians, because the influx of newbys just got way too heavy. When Ojai started installing traffic lights it was time to go, or by the way Lisa, 8 years don't get it, you have to have lived in Ojai for over 30 years to even think of calling yourself enlightned.

Make that living in Ventura, just a small mental block.

Hey Rellis, was the free ride on the silver cargo ship out of Ojai comfortable? Just wondering.

Talking about big flushes, I highly recommend you try one of the Ojai Post author's enemas, they do wonders for cleaning out 30 years of detritus. I recommend weekly, I feel much better after each one. How about we all get one? I propose enemas as the great equalizer. Whether we've been here thirty years or ten minutes, after an enema we're all sure to understand each other a little better.

In the meantime, don't be so self-conscious. Sloped forehead and narrow eyes don't look bad on you. Rather rakish. Disarming even.

Enemas are for woosa's, you never lived until you tried a Gerbil, just slather the little beast in olive oil and let him do the wandering. You seem to have a rather large infinity for stuff to push up yer arse.

I'm going to have to ask for some decorum, please, from everyone.

I grew up in Ojai and first moved here in 1976. (I don't think I'm enlightened though since I moved away and haven't lived here for a solid 30 years.) anyhow, when I recently moved back "home" I was indeed skeptical of issues of classism and racism. I was appalled at the pushy and impatient people I encountered at the deli counter in Rainbow Bridge; and the same at farmer's market. I don't know how many times I uttered, "this isn't MY ojai." And I was annoyed at those who were worried about us because we lived on Drown Street where our neighbors are Mexican and involved in gangs and drugs.

Then I remembered - there are always those people... in every town. I breathed in more slowly and settled into my town. Now I feel honored to be here, on this land, in this community.

And a word about "newbies" -- all the newbies I've met are cut from the same cloth as us long-time Ojai folk. The newbies I know are full of character, wit, charm and grace. They care for this place as though they've been here their whole lives. And they have a lot of passion.

When I first moved back it was the newbies that expressed the spirit of Ojai to me. They'd introduce themselves, invite us to stop by, offer their phone number. And sadly, it was the ones who'd been here a while that were more reserved. More suspicious of me because I'd just moved here I suppose. Being from here, that really angered me. So as an Ojai native I am proud to align myself with anyone who reflects the spirit of this magical land -- no matter how long they've been here.

Rellis, you should talk to Brandon and see if you can become an author on his new Ventura blog. We've already got a colon hydrotherapist here in Ojai, but you could offer your version for the good citizens of Ventura. Maybe not weekly though. (And watch out for those PETA people.)

OK, OK sorry for breaking library rules. But HE STARTED IT. (Waahh!) And I should get a break, because I've been here longer than all of you. I lived here in a past life. In fact, several successive past lives. Once I was known as Centenium Twine and I was famous as a shaman peacemaker among the then-flowering indigenous peoples. Then I came back as a big grizzly bear, but I got shot by the Tico brothers who were out on a bender hunting. Another time, I was Ed Libby's lesser-known younger brother Ted. I used to blow on didjeraddos under the old oak tree in what later became my brother's park. Then I came back as ... well you'll never believe me if I told you and you'd never guess either. (Let's just say Rellis I was there you know when.) But anyway, add all those years plus the last ten minutes, and its more than all of you combined! So there. (Well, except now some of YOU have come back as who I USED to be, so ... its all too confusing...)

Hello. I am moving to Ojai in January. I have been reading this blog to familiarized myself with Ojai. I will be a newbie and there is nothing I nor anyone else can do about it. I am looking forward to my move and I'm scared too. All those things you say are true of Palm Springs, where I am coming from...new traffic lights; housing tracts, stores. Different people...an invasion that hurt me deeply. But only because I loved the freedom I had for a little while before they all came. I could go out of my door into the desert with two dogs and just roam. No one was telling me to put them on a leash because no one was ever out there! Now they have expensive homes in a gated community on "my" desert and more are coming. But "they" are "me" and that is the conundrum of it all. I have roots in Santa Barbara and spent summers in Carpinteria when I was a child so I am not completely in the dark, but never spent any time in Ojai and frankly, never really wanted to! But it looks like a nice place to live and I will see you in January!

yay, i get to do the first welcoming!

Shelby, i eagerly await your arrival, as do all the wonderful characters of our valley. i'm confident that you'll enjoy being here, and i believe our community will be better for having you. please don't be afraid of the "natives"...a few of them can be restless, but they are, as the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy classifies them, "mostly harmless".

i'm not even 30 years old yet, so i'm starting to feel the faint twinges of adultism or some sort of weird arbitrary toll booth on the magical road to Validation and Respect.